My genius knows no bounds! Its incredible! Yesterday trading platform Robinhood and others halted trading for GameStop, AMC and a few others. The hedge funds who were short selling them (making money on self fulfilling price declines because of their leverage), had been getting kicked in the nuts by a trading group on Reddit called wallstreetbets. Wallstreetbets had been buying GME for sometime, taking the price from $4 to $400.
Because various hedge funds had made the leveraged bets that prices would fall, they were losing multiples when the price rose. Great stuff. Love it. Sons a bitches like them were trying to make GameStop go bankrupt by taking their stock price to zero. Instead, a snot-nosed group of 20 somethings with a Robinhood app on their smart phone were kicking Wall Streets ass.
Well hold on, the powers that be weren’t going to let Wall Street lose (“private rewards public risk policy”). So they colluded with Robinhood and others to stop trading yesterday. With the inability to buy, the upward momentum of GME halted. Not only that, but they changed the margin rules midday, then said, “Whoa! You’re not in compliance with cash on hand rules, we’re going to sell your holdings!”
The price of GME yesterday was between $112 and $489. Guess when Robinhood did the forced liquidation of their holdings? Yeah, at $118. Their customers lost a rough $370 a share because of this rule change. When Wall Street can’t compete, they just change the rules (kind of like Democrats at election time).
So the point is nothing is going to happen to these Wall Street mother fuckers. The financial press isn’t going to dig into it. Congress isn’t going to do anything. We the people are on our own. That’s when I realized, we don’t need Congress, we need 535 mannequins!
There is nothing more worthless on God’s green earth than Congress. Okay maybe mosquitoes. Mosquitoes and Congress, God’s 2 biggest mistakes. We should replace Congress with mannequins. Think about it. Wall Street is getting away with murder and Congress is not going to do a damn thing. Mannequins wouldn’t do a damn thing either, but there is so much less cost involved with them.
Mannequins don’t need food, security, housing, medical, flying back and forth to their districts, retirements, elections, never a day off. We could just switch wigs on the mannequins every 2 and 6 years and pretend they were different. When the press had questions for them we could just pull a string on the back and they could regurgitate various cliches. The Republican mannequins could say, “I’m going to bring Iowa values to Washington!” The Democrat ones could say, “We’re going to hold corporations accountable!”
There wouldn’t be any sex scandals with mannequins. Mannequins don’t take payoffs from lobbyists. When constituents visited Washington think of the photo ops?! Mannequins never have a bad hair day. They always have a killer smile. They always have a flat stomach. All the girl mannequins could look like Barbie, all the boy ones like Ken! Mannequins don’t need huge staffs, just someone to change their clothes every couple a days. I don’t see a downside.